When a business is struggling, the default response is almost always the same:

“We need better systems.”
“We need to fix the process.”
“We need a new tool.”
“We need to work harder.”

And yes – sometimes that’s true.

But more often than not, the real problem isn’t operational at all.

It’s emotional.

The uncomfortable truth behind most ‘practical’ issues

I’ve sat in enough boardrooms, coaching sessions and leadership meetings to spot a pattern.

Behind many so-called operational problems sits something far less tangible:

  • a decision that’s been avoided
  • a conversation that hasn’t been had
  • a fear of upsetting someone
  • a reluctance to let go of control
  • a comfort zone that’s quietly being protected

The spreadsheet isn’t the issue.
The CRM isn’t the issue.
The org chart isn’t the issue.

Those are symptoms.

The cause is usually emotional.

Avoidance is expensive – but it doesn’t send an invoice

Here’s why this matters.

Emotional avoidance doesn’t show up on your P&L as a line item.
It shows up indirectly:

  • in team confusion
  • in slow decision-making
  • in recurring mistakes
  • in missed opportunities
  • in leaders feeling overwhelmed and “busy”

Avoiding one difficult conversation can cost months of momentum.
Delaying one hard decision can quietly drain profit, energy and morale.

And because it happens slowly, it feels manageable – until it isn’t.

Why leaders get stuck here

Most business owners didn’t start out wanting to be “the bad guy”.

They care about their people.
They want harmony.
They want to be liked.

So they soften feedback.
They tolerate underperformance.
They explain away behaviour they wouldn’t accept from themselves.

This isn’t weakness – it’s human.

But leadership isn’t about avoiding discomfort.
It’s about being willing to sit in it long enough to move the business forward.

Growth demands emotional maturity, not just technical skill

As businesses grow, the emotional load increases:

  • more people
  • more complexity
  • more consequence
  • more decisions that don’t have perfect answers

At some point, technical competence stops being the constraint.

The real question becomes:
Can you lead when it’s uncomfortable?

Can you:

  • give clear feedback without cushioning it?
  • make decisions without universal approval?
  • let people struggle a little so they can grow?
  • hold the line when it would be easier to cave?

That’s where businesses either level up – or plateau.

The shift that changes everything

The most effective leaders I work with make one key transition:

They stop asking, “What system do we need?”

And start asking, “What am I avoiding?”

Once that question is answered honestly, the operational fixes usually become obvious – and far easier to implement. 

Because systems work best when the emotional blockers have already been removed.

A simple reflection

If your business feels stuck, noisy or heavier than it should, ask yourself:

  • What conversation have I been postponing?
  • What decision have I been delaying because it feels uncomfortable?
  • What behaviour am I tolerating that’s quietly costing us?

You don’t need to fix everything.

You usually need to face one thing you’ve been dancing around.

And when you do, momentum tends to follow quickly.

Operational excellence matters.
But emotional leadership is what unlocks it.

That’s the part most people skip.

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P.S. Missed the first episode of ‘Shift Happens’? Click Here